If You Want Something You’ve Never Had

“Cannonball into it.”

The Better Man Project ™


If you want something you’ve never had, you have to become someone you’ve never been. You must rise up to the challenge. And I hope for you, the challenge is so great that you must grow into the person who can accomplish it. I hope the dream is daunting. I hope it scares the hell out of you. I hope you fail. Because in all of this, you give yourself the chance to muster up the courage to grow out of your old shell. You get that fire inside of you. The motivation. The inspiration.

And then you work.


You lose yourself in the work. Don’t stick a toe in it. No, cannonball into it. Love it. Embrace it. Smother it. Give it everything you have. Because in your work, a work you love, love is shown in the final product itself. Show it to the world.

Fear not. Not…

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Hot Damn. I feel like I have been just absolutely swamped with homework, etc. these past few months. It’s safe to say I no longer have a social life…or any life for that matter. School and work have consumed me. Can’t say I’m a fan either. I feel like I constantly am on the go and I feel like I never have time to just stop and relax. It’s so unfortunate. Not to mention I am such a procrastinator, that probably doesn’t help. I’m so lazy its ridiculous UHG. Someone help me I’m poor (quick: name that movie reference!) Honestly I don’t have time to sit here and blog. As much as I would love to..I still have things to get done. Rough life I live I know. But I’m grateful everyday. I want to try to blog more interesting things soon! Like random facts of the day. I’ll start with one right now.

Did you know you are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider?

For all my peoples who are afraid of spiders, you’ve got nothing to worry about. It’s the booze that’ll get ya! 😉


I hate being sick. Not only do you feel like crap all day for at least 2-3 days, but you don’t want to do any work either! It’s terrible.  Plus when you’re finally starting to get over said sickness, you’ve got a shit-load of crap to do that you put off when you didn’t feel like doing it when you were sick! UHG. It’s such a hassle.  Not to mention blowing your nose is just downright annoying.  AND after a while it starts to make your nose red and raw and sore and peely and gross. Bottom line, being sick is unattractive and uncomfortable.  As you can guess, I am/almost over being sick and it is horrible! Blah. I just feel like blah. So much to do and no motivation to do it. Yuckity yuck yuck yuck!

Anyways, it doesn’t help that I am so stressed with school and work and everything else imaginable too!  Everything seems to be piling on as quickly as it possibly can all at once.  Isn’t that how it always goes? Of course it is. So in the mean time, here’s a little de-stressor to make you (and me!) feel a little better. Shwayze makes life better. Come on baby, shoot your gun in the sky.

Staff Meetings.

As some may have guessed but the appropriately placed period after the title, I am not a fan of staff meetings. Maybe I should clarify a bit, because not all staff meetings are bad, in fact, some are extremely necessary. Whether it be for friendly reminders or whatever, it’s nice to touch base with all your staff. HOWEVER, when these meetings are extremely unorganized and long and basically pointless, is it really worth it to have them? I am admitting, I may be talking about just one specific staff meeting here, but keep in mind this could pertain to lots! I am talking about MONTHLY staff meetings where relatively NOTHING gets accomplished. Where we go around the room and spend more time talking about ourselves and what our favorite _________ is than actually about work. Seriously dude? I’ve got better sht to do! Like homework! Or watching one of my bazillion TV shows! Or reading! Seriously, lots of better things to do. If they’re so boring then why do I go? You may be wondering this….why let me tell you. At the end of the staff-wide (is that the correct term??) email that is sent out, there is always a little threat of some nature explaining that this is in fact a mandatory meeting and you cannot miss or ______ consequence will occur. You may think oh psh what are you 5? Scared of some consequence? To which I respond: YES, yes I am afraid of some puny consequence. Don’t laugh, sometimes they are stupider and more time consuming than actually going to the staff meetings. Now another thing, I don’t want you to think I’m all anti getting together with my coworkers to talk about how the job is going. No I’m not saying that at all. I’m saying for most jobs (aka the one job I don’t want to go to) it is stupid and unproductive for these meetings to take place every freaking month. And at inconvenient times! I think that every other month would be so much better. Also, I have been told I have one of the nicest bosses (different job than the one I’m complaining about) ever. She brings us dinner or snacks (usually healthy ones too!) which I find is a very effective incentive to go! This boss on the other hand, nada, zip, zilch! Es muy triste.

Realized I forgot to post this because I had to leave for my meeting mid type! Uhg. I’m so forgetful. Sometimes I don’t know where I’d be without my planner/calendar/phone to remind me of what I have to do. It’s a miracle that I don’t forget more assignments or work related things, I tell ya. Well I’m off to hit the hay! I’ve got a busy Friday coming up! I have to finish up my Cars themed board game for work! All the kids have been designing them all week and we get to play them tomorrow! I’m so excited. Eeeeek!


Alright, for any of you who have had to under go a surgery, you know how much it absolutely sucks. Going into it everyone says oh it’ll be so nice you can just lay in the couch or in bed all day and do nothing. Well yeah that is what usually happens, but it’s not because you want to, it’s because your in too much pain to physically do anything else!

Two years ago I had a tonsillectomy and adenoidectomy then this year I had my wisdom teeth removed. Both were painful processes. Okay I don’t actually remember the procedures because obviously I was completely knocked out for the surgery but boy oh boy the after absolutely sucks.

Not to mention they are both mouth surgeries which means EATING was horrible. When I had my tonsils removed…that was wayyy worse than the wisdom teeth. Don’t get me wrong, this is painful, but when I has my tonsils out, it hurt to talk, swallow, yawn, sneeze, you name it and it hurt. I lost 10 pounds when I got my tonsils out because I ate nothing but ice chips for a week and a half. It was terrible.
After that I never wanted to get another mouth surgery again! It was terrible to not be able to do anything (I mean it happened over my winter break so at least I didn’t have to worry about school, BUT STILL). So it’s two years later and my dentist said I should probably get my wisdom teeth out. He told me this in the summer and I was thinking okay yeah I’ll tell my mom…HA yeah right. Well our family dentist is a family friend so of course my mother finds out and tells me I need to make an appointment. Lucky for me, my dentist said he could give me laughing gas and do it right in the dentist office, I said oh helllllll no to that. If I am going through with this then I’m getting sedated, HEAVILY SEDATED. So, much to my dismay, I make an appointment with the oral surgeon my dentist recommends. (Keep in mind this is all occurring in the summer) So we meet, all is fine and dandy, except I waited until the end of the summer because why would I want to go through this in the middle of my glorious summer? The doc checks out my teeth and all looks good (all four have been growing in steadily for a while) so we decide I will get all four extracted at once. Why go through more than one surgery when the doctor is going to be in my mouth anyways…just kidding I know sometimes only two are a problem so they only take two out or whatever the case may be. Anyways! As I’m leaving the lovely nurse asks me to set up an appointment (awkwardly I might add) and we come to the discovery that surprise surprise, he’s booked until early September! Ohh shoot, I’ll be back at school. So I politely say I’ll have to call back when I check my schedule. Running through my head at the time were two things. 1. Yes! I’m just never going to get my wisdom teeth out! 2. Oh crap my mother is going to kill me, this is my fault for not making my consultation sooner. So I get home with the news and we decide that I will just have to either find a weekend to come home and get them out (I was determined not to let that happen) or I could get them out over winter break. As you can assume, I did not have surgery during the school year (thank god) and so when I came home for Christmas the suggestions that I call the oral surgeons office started coming, naturally I ignored them. (My theory: I didn’t want the surgery, I didn’t call). Well unfortunately, mother decided to take matters into her own hands (I didn’t put up a fight because deep down, I knew it had to be done). And here I sit, rather, here I lay, with 2-3 pillows propped under my head/shoulders.
I think I did myself a favor by psyching myself out and thinking the pain was going to be similar/ the same as when I got my tonsils out. Thank goodness it wasn’t! Don’t get me wrong, I am still in pain! But not nearly as bad as before. My main complaint, it’s just uncomfortable. I can’t eat any sharp foods, which of course are the ones I want, and my breath smells HORRID. I talked to the doctor because everyone in my family was telling me how gross it was and I guess that’s normal. You see, the holes where my teeth used to be are like a cut on your arm, as it begins healing this clear puss liquid starts to ooze out. That’s what is coming out of my gums! Fantastic isn’t it!? No it’s not. In fact it’s gross and I can feel/taste it sometimes and I gross myself out. But at least it’s going okay, right? I just have to be antisocial for a while I guess! So yes, that is my account of the wonderful surgeries I have endured.

Okay side note. Doctors offices weird me out. Every time you go there is bound to be an awkward confrontation. I don’t care if you’re going to the regular doctor or the dentist or a hospital or physical therapy or a specialty doctor or whatever! It’s awkward!! You go up and sheepishly say you’re here for your appointment. Do you state your name right away? Do you wait for the receptionist to ask for your name? What do you do!? Okay so you struggle through that first encounter and now you’re asked to sit and wait. I don’t know if its just me, but every damn time I go to a doctors office, it feels as if I am the only one there, like there was a zombie apocalypse and I am the only person left in the waiting area. So you would think because there is no one else around that it would be a quick minute wait or so. NO. Usually it’s 15- 20 minutes. At least in my experience, although I may be exaggerating a touch, YOU ALL KNOW WHAT I MEAN. So then another nurse (so many people work in these places..must be because they’re always so busy…..) finally comes and get you and takes you to the holding cell…I mean little room (patient room? What are they called?). They ask you pointless stupid filler questions to pass the time as you walk to said room. Then they get you all set up in the room on the table or chair or wherever you’re supposed to be and then they leave! So now you’re sitting there twiddling your thumbs for god knows how long until the doctor comes. Now you may or may not have noticed that most of the time these rooms have no clocks, no windows, and boring informational packets for you to read. Sometimes they have a year old magazine or two but that’s about it! How are you supposed to pass the time!? Not to mention they always have those signs “No Cell Phones Allowed” or “Turn Off Cell Phones Past This Door” or something to that variety. I can never tell when it’s serious or not. Sometimes I think it’s okay to just have it on silence, but sometimes people say the frequencies mess with the machines!? I never know! So then I get nervous about pulling out my phone to pass the time. Although if you think about it, what is the doctor going to do if he/she walks in and I’m on my phone? Probably nothing. But you don’t know that forsure…it’s the fear of the unknown! Okay so you have your appointment and now your leaving. As you work your way through the maze of hallways just desperately trying to find the deserted lobby, do you get nosy and peak around at the people/nurses/equipment that you see? Or is it an eyes straight ahead, pretend you see nothing type deal? No one knows! Then you make it out but now you’ve got to confront the receptionist again, do you stop to make an appointment? Will they call you? Will you call them? Those few seconds where you are deciding what to do are also some of the most awkward seconds ever. Then you leave thinking, wow I probably looked like and idiot just there. Never fear, we all go through that same thing. No? Well, just me then. Awesome. Queen of Awkwardness.

Now I know there are people who have gotten worse surgeries and have been out of commission for longer than my two mouth surgeries (ahem..Amanda and her knee) but hey I can only speak from experience. 😉

That is all I have to say about the topic of surgeries and I guess doctor’s offices as well. Remember, you have received wonderful insight into a queen’s mind today. Be grateful for that. 😀 <—that is such a cheesy smiley and usually I hate it, but it seems fitting right now.

If I don't blow away in this windstorm, I will be writing again soon. Until then.

Tim Halperin

Ooooheeee it’s been a while since my last post! Just as a follow up on my previous posts, my ear is still infected and I didn’t do the polar bear plunge. Moving on!

New Year’s Resolutions are so stupid. Everyone makes them and follows them for ohh about a week and then usually falls slowly back into their previous routine. I’m sorry if that was offensive. But MOST of the time its true…As for me, instead of being super strict on myself, I just decided that I am going to work out more “in general”. I am not going to be a lazy bum anymore! I have no excuses! You might be wondering how that is going for me. You’ll be happy to know it worked! …once. I went to the gym once! But hey that’s a big improvement from not going at all. A big pat on the back to me. Yay!

On to the title of this blog, Tim Halperin. I happen to stumble across this young man while my spotify was on random. His song Pretty Girls came on and I really liked it. His voice is realllly nice. So I listened to some more of his songs, and I love it! I go to Google the guy and it turns out he was on American Idol…what?! I was very surprised. And now you know why I’m not a huge fan of that show. I mean this guy is GOOD. Not to mention he’s pretty good looking too! He’s got such a nice smile, it looks like this is mid laugh, and oh how I would like to meet him mid laugh.

Hellllo Tim.

So there it is, or rather, there he is. The reason for this blog. New artist of the day, CHECK HIM OUT because he is fantastic. Not only a great singer, but not to shabby to look at either 😉

Not too much new here otherwise! Oh wait! I had an awesome night tonight! I drove my (18 year old) brother to his haircut today because he was too lazy to drive himself and it was great! We talked the whole time there and back and it was just a great bonding moment for us. No fighting or bickering or anything! I loved every second of it.

That is all on this end friends. I am going to try to blog more frequently now I promise…it’s one of my new years resolutions 😉

Until next time!